Sophie Lynne Creations

There’s something so inviting about a full café. Cups clinking, mouths moving; I’m obsessed with the scene. It’s a calm yet hectic sprawl. Since the beginning of high school, I’ve found myself drawn to the strange serenity of cafés. Living in the smallest state has proved helpful to this, as I know many coffee shops in Rhode Island like the back of my hand.

If you’re a common café dweller like me, you understand that different areas of cafés house different types of people. In the deep corners sit the outlet-seeking, computer-tapping, headphones-in workers. An iced tea sits on the table to the right of their laptop gathering a pool of condensation, not a single sip taken. With carpal tunnel and back problems in the foreseeable future, these workers pause only when interrupted and keep their head down. Now, let’s journey to the other end of the spectrum. In the middle of the café, sit the sunglasses-on-head, business-casual (or soccer-mom-casual) talkers. Animated gestures and in-depth stories ensue, as the workers in the corners push their headphones a little harder into their ears.

I have always sat somewhere in the middle ground. I don’t shove myself in a corner with my headphones in, but I also don’t go with friends and laugh loudly at a circular table. I’m a very social person, but I feel strongly about going to cafés alone. In a non-selfish way, it’s my time. I sit in a comfortable chair and have a cup of coffee with my thoughts. Whether I’m doing work on my laptop or taking notes with my favorite gel pen, there are enough distractions that I’m not distracted. I feel content in my little chair between the workers and talkers. I let myself have the freedom to people-watch while I type papers and have a muffin while I get my work done. The more I give myself that freedom, the better that paper ends up coming out.

To me, everyone could benefit from a little more alone time. I’m a big believer in pressing the reset button on your brain (something that is best done alone). When I was an exchange student in southern France, I spent some time reading and thinking in a café near my host family’s house. Whether I could understand the conversations around me or not, I felt so wrapped up and content in the buzz of humanity… ruminating, digesting, thinking. Don’t get me wrong, I have the best friends and family I could ask for. But go take some time to have a coffee by yourself in a busy café and I think you’ll understand what I’m getting at.

What do you do if you want to get to know someone? Time. Spend some time with them, ask open-ended questions, listen, share. Sit in a coffee shop with them and notice what they order. The same applies when it comes to self-reflection. If you don’t treat yourself like a friend to whom you want to get closer, how do you know who you are?

I digress, yet I’ve learned how important it is for me to know when to put the laptop away. By nature, nurture, and I’m not sure what else, I have fallen into times of being a headphones-in, corner café workaholic. Throughout high school, I’ve learned when I need to make myself sit down, have a coffee with my thoughts, and press my reset button. I’ve learned to order myself a chocolate chip cookie when I need it. I’ve learned to get up and spend twenty minutes looking around the shoe store next to the café when I start to get frustrated. The paper will get done. The textbook chapter will be read; but not if you don’t prioritize getting to know the person behind the typing hands once in a while.

It’s a funny art, the art of café dwelling. In the south of France, my hometown, or my college coffee shop, I look forward to many more chocolate chip cookies and rumination.